A glorious Harvest Moon! I wish the skies were clearer so I could see her better. The full moon always screws with my sleep cycles I think... the energy makes it hard to just shut down. So here am again...
Today was largely uneventful, but significant. I love when I have time for introspection! And music! I feel as if I've been so absorbed in work and the news that I've forgotten to nurture my create side but yes, BALANCE! I'm working on it.
Ooo... I've also started up a Book of Fortune again. A cute little green leatherette notebook is now following me when ever my wallet comes along too. Recording down all my money flows from various accounts and such, it's quite useful really. At home there is a happy little dime spell going to accompany it.
Also the house is slowly getting de-clutterfied. I never noticed how much of a pack rat I can be at times. It's brought back some memories... not painful or strong just flitting images from the past. It's odd how even things that weren't significant at the time can instantly put you back in the mindset you once had, it really illustrates how far I've come.
And while the first seedlings of balance of money and mind have been planted I still need to get my health under control. I may have given up meat, and lost a ton of weight, but I still can't seem to eat well consistently... Today was no different cookies and chocolate milk. The things 2 hour phone calls with tech support can drive you to do!
Still I'm trying to improve myself nice and steady, keeping a "light touch" and all that good stuff.
Love and Light,
-Onyx
Friday, September 24, 2010
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Mabon 2010
Its that awesome time of year again. The leaves are turning, the apples are ripening, and the days are getting shorter. As the day and night reach their balance I find increasingly that balance is what I need in my life. Balance in finance, balance in my love life, balance in my job, balance in my health...
Today was a perfect example. I was up til 5am, slept til 3pm... and did absolutely nothing for hours. Something just felt off, out of sync. I was frustrated with myself. Here I am almost 23 still living at home, single, working at empire-of-evil-mart. Does that reflect me? At my core I am ambitious, full of love, and have a real desire to change the world for the better. Why the disconnect?
I have decided. I need to change, whole heartedly but not so fast as to burn out. I have no idea if my experiences match that of my peers but I find it easy to jump into things head first but very hard to stick with them. So in honor of the seasons I felt a little ritual and spellwork were in order.
My Goals are as follows:
>Get a job more in line with my inner desire (Balance in work)
>Document and evaluate my finances (Balance in finances)
>Exercise consistently (Balance in health)
>Get out and be an active seeker of the affection I deserve (Balance in love)
Today was one of those days where what the divine has been telling you forever finally gets heard. How long have things been pointing to extreme lack or an extreme excess of things in my life. I'm tired of living my life in extremes, and gods willing I will get a balance to things.
Love and Light
-Onyx
Today was a perfect example. I was up til 5am, slept til 3pm... and did absolutely nothing for hours. Something just felt off, out of sync. I was frustrated with myself. Here I am almost 23 still living at home, single, working at empire-of-evil-mart. Does that reflect me? At my core I am ambitious, full of love, and have a real desire to change the world for the better. Why the disconnect?
I have decided. I need to change, whole heartedly but not so fast as to burn out. I have no idea if my experiences match that of my peers but I find it easy to jump into things head first but very hard to stick with them. So in honor of the seasons I felt a little ritual and spellwork were in order.
My Goals are as follows:
>Get a job more in line with my inner desire (Balance in work)
>Document and evaluate my finances (Balance in finances)
>Exercise consistently (Balance in health)
>Get out and be an active seeker of the affection I deserve (Balance in love)
Today was one of those days where what the divine has been telling you forever finally gets heard. How long have things been pointing to extreme lack or an extreme excess of things in my life. I'm tired of living my life in extremes, and gods willing I will get a balance to things.
Love and Light
-Onyx
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